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Monday, April 30, 2007

Revised Lame Dream Team

This is a totally revised lame dream team for both SIB(KL) and UTP.

SIB(KL) Lame Dream Team:

First Team
Nic Lee (King Jedi)
San Weng Onn (Master Jedi)
Daniel Koh (Master Jedi)
Vincent Cheah (Master Jedi)
Christopher Wee (Master Jedi)
Samuel Wee (Master Jedi)
Au Yong Wai Peng (Master Jedi)
Yap Chin Kuan (Master Jedi)
Andrew Teh (Master Jedi)
Andrew Yew (Jedi Knight)
Ooi Khye Shin (Jedi Knight)
Aaron Patell (Jedi Knight)
Jonathan Ng Kin Weng (Jedi Knight)
Jonathan Lee Boon Gin (Jedi Knight)
Christon Emang (Jedi Knight)
Pei Ling (Jedi Knight)
Gerard Chow (Jedi Knight)

Reserve Team(Padawans - potential)

Felix Voon
Daniel Tan Sr.
Daniel Tan Jr.

Andy Loh
Siew Kwan
Sharmane

Youth Academy(babies - Need A LOT MORE TRAINING)
Felicia Ng
Shammie
Sharon Ng
Yee San


UTP Lame Dream Team:

First Team:
Christon Emang (Jedi Master)
Eddy Tan (Jedi Master)
Aaron Teh (Jedi Master)
Jason Anderson (Jedi Knight)
Javiar (Jedi Knight)
Richard Liaw (Jedi Knight)

Reserve Team(Padawans – potential)
Karen
Jenny

Thian Mei Fang
Wendy
Lizzie

Youth Academy (Need A LOT OF TRAINING)
Hor Wei Vern
Yen Piing
Seok Yee
(she needs the most training)

I would like to pay my respects to the elite lame team of SIB(KL), the group 3+1, that currently consists of Daniel Koh, Christopher Wee and Samuel Wee.

Ipoh, & Dresses & Lameness

I'd no plans to go out. I was supposed to be bored, and stay in my hostel and study my IBIS (Introduction to Business Information Systems) book, which is one of the most boring books in the world. Then fate would have it I came across Renae and she asked if I wanted to go out to Ipoh on Saturday and almost without thinking I said yes straight away. I just wanted out of my uni for a while. Some were more fortunate to go back to their hometowns and everything, I wasn't, but it's given me a chance to be lame with new people for once so that's been awesome, converting people to become lame is my new hobby from now on.

Anyway..... I'd decided to go to Ipoh Parade, since there are more clothes, shoes and things I might actually buy there as opposed to Jusco where I just....... walk wherever my friends happen to walk. I was a little surprised to see what Renae was wearing, since uni has strict rules about what we have to wear and stuff like that. It's like one of those moments when you see this girl in high school in uniform everyday that doesn't look so hot, but then when you go out on an outing with her, she somehow looks hotter, you know? Anyway, Emy tagged along with us as well, she would soon regret coming because even before we left uni, she'd already become the victim of countless of lame insults just barraged at her.

At Ipoh Parade, we went into (NOT AROUND, INTO) a lot of shops. Both girls already had a target for today, it was to buy a dress each for a formal occasion, or perhaps a nice top and a good skirt to match. I was very happy to tag along, for some reason, I enjoy following girls when they shop for THEIR CLOTHES, not mine, hahaha! I even give my input every now and then too. The first piece bought was picked up by Renae, it wasn't anything formal, just this little pink low cut top, looked fine on her.

So we kept on going into each and every shop with their target in mind. They tried some stuff but it just didn't fit as they'd have liked it to. It was one of those 'you need the body for this piece' kind of thing and that was when I concluded girls just keep their shape for clothes, not guys, although it would be for guys indirectly. We found one nice black one for Emy but it just needed to be a little longer and it'd have been perfect but it just wouldn't do. There was one shop though, that we spent quite a long time in. There was some good stuff there. Renae wouldn't let me have a look at two of the tops she tried on because she was too HOT in it or something, once again, we found something that REALLY REALLY suited Emy. She tried it on, it was this white dress and it was pretty nice but there was one issue. The dress had a hole somewhere in it, and that dress was the only one they had. That was really frustrating. In the end, neither one achieved their target, Renae got off track and bought another 'going-out' top and Emy... got nothing, but some very coveted liquid paper, lol.

After all that walking we went back to UTP, and after we'd got off the bus at the front gate, we all realised how tired we were, which would affect certain events later. Halfway through our journey back to the hostel, I just couldn't help but be lame so I started off on my whole spontaneous lame joke extravaganza and we were all laughing. In fact, the lameness got so strong until Emy couldn't even walk and she had to sit on the grass for a moment before recovering from the strike of lame jokes. Ah.. those precious times. Glad I went out with the two of them, it was nice, fun.... and lame.. +)

Current Updates

Time to post a little on what's been happening to me, and not others like mAncheSter UnIted and not about what I've been feeling lately although there's a slight clue to that later on. Will have another one on my trip to Ipoh later.

I just had my drama presentation today, on a Sunday morning. What that meant was I had to perform a sketch and skip church. I think it's the first time I've skipped church for such a weird reason. I only remember skipping church because I overslept. Anyway, it was pretty cool, drama went all right although there were a few tonnes of hiccups here and there, even when I played my reedited version of John Mayer's 'Daughters' that I transformed into a song to propose to a girl that I love in this drama. It's a pity the person acting as the girl is a guy, it would be SO MUCH NICER singing it to a girl. For those who wonder how he made the breasts, it wasn't the traditional tissue paper or mandarin oranges (why do people even use mandarin oranges?) but balloons filled with water that were secured in position by the help of raffia string.
Note: It bounces perfectly when he jumps or moves his body.

One thing about my drama was for fun, we used the names of our friends in the same English tutorial groups as us for the names of our characters. Obviously the girl I 'fell in love' with and sang a 'love song' to was named after one of our classmates. To me at first, it was just a funny kind of thing, but I never expected that she LIKED IT A LOT. After the drama, she asked me to pass her a soft copy of they lyrics! Never, in any type of dream would I have thought she would be emotionally moved and TOUCHED by the song. Oh well, life's like that, it's a plus sign for me. Shows I can touch girls hearts by reediting songs and singing it to them [yeah right, but I wish it were true though. =)].

I've been practicing my John Mayer stuff recently in my preparation to hopefully write a song in the near future. Thus, I've been trying to get my hands on some of his live videos and such. Going through this experience of playing more John Mayer chords, I've come to the conclusion that he's simply an acoustic genius and I think I'll be in love with him for the rest of my life, I believe the same goes for Khye Shin, Chris Wee and Daniel Koh, I think.

Oh, and I have an announcement to make, this is my new Lame People of The World (UTP) Dream Team (rankings are based on Lame Star Wars terminology):

Christon (lame jedi mASter)
Eddy (lame jedi knight)
Karen (lame apprentice)
Jenny (lame apprentice & lame joke victim of Christon)
Yen Phing (is that correct spelling?) (high level lame joke victim of Christon)
Javiar (lame joke receiver)
Richard (lame joke knight and receiver)
Seok Yee (highest level lame joke victim of Christon)

Lame People of The World (SIBKL) Dream Team:
Nic Lee (Lame King of Lame Planet)
San Weng Onn (Lame Prince)
Christopher Wee
Samuel Wee
Rudy
Yap
Andrew Teh
Jon Ng Boon Gin
Ooi Khye Shin
James Chew

Everyone in the SIBKL team are lame jedi masters, except Nic, he's like the ultimate lame *humzter.

I had a lot of fun over dinner converting Karen to become lame tonight, not to mention being lame myself. It's good to be lame, it's what makes the world go around. Let our lame powers combine and experience the most memorable time of our lives. It is during those moments, we realise that we're meant to people that can have ridiculous fun, not like those people on tv that only know how to be emo. Be your true self, be lame.

Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Not for people who don't like football

Again, the magic time being 2.45 a.m for all European Champions League football matches, I had to sacrifice precious sleeping time to witness the first leg of the semi final between Manchester United and AC Milan. Once again, I walked over from my hostel every so faithfully to the mamak shop I always go to watch Manchester United's Champions League games.

My team (Manchester United) came into the game, missing several key players, particularly defenders, with the likes of the first team players Rio Ferdinand, Vidic and Gary Neville, Mikael Silvestre out injured. Even backup defender Craig Cathacart was injured in training and ruled out for the whole season. We also missed the attacking options of Louis Saha up front, also due to injury and Park Ji Sung as well. If you total up the injured players, its six altogether, and all of them are serious contenders for the starting lineup.

We also came into the game after slumping to a 1-1 draw with lowly but tough Middlesbrough and also with defender Patrice Evra doubtful for the game after someone from Sheffield United decided to slide tackle his ass for some reason in the game before. So there were a lot of major concerns for Manchester United's defence going into the game.

Surprisingly enough, Patrice Evra was declared fit to play and was in the starting lineup against AC Milan. So Heinze who usually plays on the left wing of defence played centre while Evra took his place, and O' Shea played on the right in place of Gary Neville. We finally had Giggs and Ronaldo starting on the left and right wings respectively after Rooney's been playing on Giggs wing position for whatever reason in the past few games.

Ronaldo put United ahead in one of his more unusual goals, it was a header from Giggs corner but it went in simply because the goalkeeper, Dida, palmed the ball up and could only knock the ball into his own net at second attempt. That was in the fifth minute. United controlled the game well after that, but in the 22nd minute Seedorf put in a through ball for Kaka and from the tightest of angles from the left side of the goal he somehow managed to squeeze a low shot into the bottom right corner of the goal. Then, in the 37th minute, Kaka found himself alone, running at three defenders, Wes Brown, Evra and Heinze, he turned past Brown and Heinze had him but Evra decided to jump in the air in front of Kaka but just ended up knocking himself and Heinze to the ground and Kaka, only had a one on one with Van de Sar which he comfortably converted.

You should have seen the Old Trafford crowd then, everyone was standing, quiet. I think all were quite shocked Kaka scored twice within 20 minutes. So that was it and United went into half time with me feeling depressed at a scoreline of 1-2.

Well, after the break, Giggs and Ronaldo switched sides to what I think was a much better effect. Ronaldo started doing his thing, just running and jiggling the ball but he never found a way through, which was quite annoying. United missed many chances, particularly when Carrick missed less than five metres from goal from a Giggs corner and Ronaldo took a shot and Dida saved brilliantly. It looked as though Milan were very determined not to concede another goal. They all crowded the box and the genius of Paul Scholes chipped the ball from just outside the box above everyone in the box to Rooney and he scored a beautiful tap in.

There it was, 2-2. It was still a bad thing because if the scores remained level and if United drew 1-1 against Milan in the next game at the San Siro, Milan would go through because they scored more goals away from home. If they drew at a score or 2-2 or above in the next games, then it would go on to extra time and penalties. A loss at the San Siro would send them out automatically on aggregate. United would have to win at Milan to get an automatic ticket to the final if this game ended in a draw. It was very dissapointing.

Ninety minutes had already passed, the game was in the 2nd minute of stoppage time and the game headed into a draw. I got off my chair at the mamak shop, and paid for my drink, and just as I turned to leave, I heard the screams of 'GOAL!!" from everyone inside the shop and you could see everyone hugging each other while I turned around again just in time to see Rooney reeling away in celebration. A beautiful pass from Giggs at the centre in the Milan half of the field to Rooney on the right, let Rooney just push his body away and lash a low hard shot into the bottom right hand corner of Dida's goal and Old Trafford erupted in euphoria as they knew how important that goal was.

Final Score: Manchester United 3, AC Milan 2

A draw against Milan in the San Siro will be enough to take United to the final, but United cannot afford to lose, even by a one goal margin because Milan will go through upon the away goals rule. Hopefully we'll get a draw or a win in the next match.

Monday, April 23, 2007

Earnest desires

Well, this post's gonna be religious somewhat, so if you're not into reading this kind of stuff, you're most welcome to skip to the next blog or webpage you're going to read but if not, anyone else is most welcome to listen to something from my heart.

Shortly after the begining of the year, I met a group of new people in Hope of God(Ipoh) church that had just came into UTP. They looked a pretty friendly bunch, which indeed they were and I started to mix around with some of them and found a good connection. It was easy for me to talk to them.

It just started as a light friendship with them but the bond grew stronger when we came together as a group to form a band for the UTP battle of the bands competition, Euphonious. It forced me to spend more time with them, more than I would have if it wasn't for Euphonious. The serious and laughable moments druing our practices were what brought us closer together as friends. It wasn't just the band though, I got to know a couple of others as well who weren't in the band who are just a really nice bunch of people with really good attitudes.

After Euphonious, I roped in these guys to help out in the band for church. During our practices and performances, I believe I saw what was a honest and honourable desire just to serve God in the area of our strengths, particularly music. It's actually been pretty amazing how willing and committed these new people have been in putting effort into practices at church, even until 4 a.m in the morning which is a new record for us. The previous record was 3 a.m. Mind you each time we go to practice in church, we just stay overnight in the church.

Apart from the music though, I've had a chance to know what these people are really about through some pretty normal conversations with them. What I've come to see is a group of young people that have a really earnest desire to honour God because I believe they've been touched and inspired to do what they can for the church. Not only that, from what I've seen from being in discussion groups with them, there's just a real desire, a heart to want to honour God. What I am truly inspired by is really the heart of someone, which I believe never really bothered about his/her Christian life that know really wants to know Him as a father and a friend, and not as the big judge up there. This person wants to strengthen his/her faith in Him and hearing that desire is just really encouraging. You just sense there's this urge to want something more from God and not just stay standstill in the place where you are. It's not just this person, everyone really has a genuine heart and all of them really want to take something back from God, not just attend the weekend rituals.

I'm just glad that I'm around to see it, and perhaps to be a part of growing together with this awesome group of young people.

Saturday, April 21, 2007

Virginia Tech, I haven't much to say but I agree with this person over here. Take your time to read it, it isn't long. This person is Max Hsu of Superchic[k].

Thursday, April 19, 2007

Choker Tag

I doubt anyone who reads my blog understands and loves this game as much as I do but I'm a big fan of cricket. For me, that's the best sport in the world and is incomparable to any other As any other sport, your love for it starts from watching a team that attracts you, and that team is the national squad of South Africa, who own the world number two ranking behind Australia. I don't understand why so many Malaysians who know a little about cricket think Pakistan and India are number one, who both happen to be in some of their worst shape ever. Nonetheless I wish to offer condolences to Bob Woolmer's family, Bob was coach of Pakistan who died the day right after Pakistan were eliminated from this year's World Cup. His death is still under investigation.

Anyway, the point I want to bring here is that the South African cricket team has been consistently labeled a 'choker' team, being unable to win when it really counts and seem to buckle under pressure. It happenned in 1999 when they lost by one run (basically one hit in baseball for the uninformed) to Australia in the World Cup semi-finals. Recently it happenned again when they lost against Bangladesh recently (Bangladesh in this situation is comparable to the Malaysian national football team). Just a few days ago, they lost their choker tag, as they were expected to lose against England just because they usually falter in these do-or-die situations but they managed a very comfortable victory.

So what? Why should I be blogging about some sport no one knows about? Well, today, I just revived my own choker tag. I represented my village(hostel block) for the university's inter-village squash tournament. Going up against three opponents, I thought I could at least win two or give two of the three a reasonable fight. I can say I was 'technically' better than two of them but it just didn't happen. I lost both those two matches in straight sets, going down 9-4, 9-6 in the first and 9-6, 10-9 in the second. When I was warming up and having my practice matches against Renae, I definitely did what I wanted to do but all that dissapeared in my tournament games.

The last game I played reminded me of what I constantly do in almost every sport where I am playing competitively with the sole focus of winning. I will lead the set or game for a long time but once I am less than three points from victory, I immediately succumb to some mysterious power that saps my match winning abilities and eventually end up losing the set. This has happenned to me COUNTLESS TIMES for squash, tennis and badminton (back when I was better in badminton, don't ask me to play that anymore, I'm too lazy). How can you CONSISTENTLY LOSE when you CONSISTENTLY get yourself in WINNING SITUATIONS. Guess my 'choker' tag never really left huh.

Sunday, April 15, 2007

After the babimath

After that super babi incident which I ranted in the earlier post which I will decline to explain any further about, something much nice happenned tonight, just about an hour after dinner. I'd just finished an hour of FIFA 07 (playing my sixth season already within two semesters), and I headed over to buy something from the convenience store about five minutes away from my hostel block.

On the way, I passed this car with people inside looking at me like I was some kind of saviour, I couldn't help but look back as I walked past for about three seconds then I told myself not to bother and keep on walking. Then, this lady came out of the car and HIT ME WITH HER HANDBAG!! I was like WHATTTT!?!?!

..... no I'm just kidding (I'm having a lame feeling but I have no SIBKLians to share it with. I miss San Weng Onn). ANYWAY, she opened her car door and asked me where she could register her son for Educamp, for the third batch. Educamp is a three day programme organised by Petronas to asses and interview potential candidates to become Petronas scholars that may study in UTP or overseas for various engineering and information technology programmes. I couldn't really tell her much although I told her maybe she could go to one of the offices that held all the room keys, because that's where I led another girl to the last time, she also came for one of the previous batches for Educamp this week.

Shortly after, the guy himself started asking some questions about UTP followed by his dad. We talked for quite a while until the point where there were other cars that they were blocking. They soon parked their car at the side, and the whole family came to approach me, HAHAHAHHAHA! So they asked me several questions about the university, and the chances of their son entering UTP, his name's Chee Hong from KL, CATHOLIC HIGH SCHOOL y'all!! That place produces smart hot and spicy chicks, wahahahahaha! But actually, Damansara Jaya still better. Anyway, Chee Hong applied for the course that I'm doing now, BIS (Business Information Systems).

Chee Hong obviously asked me a lot on how to do well during the interview and what are some of the small things that might enhance his chances of landing the Petronas sponsorship. I shared with him my own Educamp experience, going through an English and IQ test on the second day, followed by the interview on the last day. All I could really tell him was to keep a good confidence going into the interview, but not to be cocky, be a team player during the group interview by not dominating and getting the others to speak as well, portraying some sort of leadership ability and as well to be clear in speech so that he would be understood well enough by his interviewers. There's a sense of excitement in this young kid and his parents as well, you can tell they're really hoping he'll get in just like anyone else would. I also shared a little bit with him of how UTP life is like, letting him in on what he's in for should he make it.

I really sense something good about his guy, he's got a good attitude. From what I see, I think he'll definitely be very grateful for any oppertunity he's given and won't take it for granted. All the best Chee Hong. =)

URgggh!!!!

WHY IS IT that almost EVERY TIME I talk to this person about SERIOUS MATTERS, I ALWAYS end up feeling STRESSED, TIRED and BURDENED. I'm getting tired of making my point to her.

ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Friday, April 13, 2007

In Song

As of late, I've been learning a couple of contemporary songs or alternative perhaps (it's hard to define the genre), mainly from Switchfoot and John Mayer. Close friends of mine would know that I really appreciate this side of music, 'contemporary'. It's simply because to a certain extent, contemporary brings you away from being labelled to a particular genre. As Jon Foreman from Switchfoot said in an interview for sessions @ AOL, "Genre is like a cage." Contemporary can switch from something light from the tune of John Mayer's '3x5' to Switchfoot's 'We are One Tonight'. It can even go on to something more jazzy or funked.

Having played a couple of their songs, I've wanted to try to create something of my own that sounds a little similar. I've had my hand at songwriting before, on my own and with Khye Shin. It's no easy task. I think I'll start to work on a melody on the guitar first before putting it into words, as opposed to what I did previously. I used to write everything down but it never really fit in with the guitar melodies that I used.

One thing that frequently occurs is I'll have a tune of words in my head that I'll sing out on my own, but I never write it down for some reason. It's annoying because the times when I come up with these are when I don't have a pen and paper. Maybe I should bring a voice recorder with me next time. I'll be trying to think up of a song that's not so heavy, in terms of instrumets playing together, maybe something lighter, John Mayerish perhaps, haha! Even people like myself and Khye Shin that like punk and emocore really like John's stuff. Even when we jam together, we play stuff that sounds a tiny bit like his.

So now..... off to find John Mayerish chords (honestly, he uses some really weird chords) that sound much nicer than the ones you always use to play rock and to get some good lyrics.

Help anyone?

Wednesday, April 11, 2007

A tale of MAXIMUM UTILITY and OPPORTUNITY COST

In the world of economics, which I have been introduced to by the nature of the course I take in university, the terms utility and opportunity cost. Utility means the amount of satisfaction you gain from doing, making or getting something. Opportunity cost on the other hand is the sacrifice that you make in order to gain a particular amount of utility. Let me share with you how these two 'economic' principles were at work in my life TODAY.

As of 11.00 p.m, the night before, I was working toward finishing my dreaded IPSP (Introduction to Programming and Problem Solving) lab report so that I could print it this morning and pass it up before 2 p.m. It took a very long while because I needed the help of a friend that was already helping someone else. I was very anxious, because I knew I needed to be free at the most, by 2.30 a.m. I got my friend to help me as soon as I could obtain his 'invaluable services'. By the time I had finished the report, it was 2.15 a.m. I quickly said goodbye and made my way off as soon as I could.

I took about 20 minutes by one third running, a third jogging and another third walking to reach my desired destination. The time I reached there, was 2.35 on the clock of the mamak restaurant, it was 2.45 on mine. In my mind, I always had to be there before 2.45 a.m. At last, kick off began and it was the beginning of a crucial match for Manchester United against AS Roma, the second leg of the quarter finals of the European Champions League.

I was worried about the choice I made, what if they lost again? I gained no utility the last time round from watching them lose at a location so far away from my hostel. The opportunity cost was great, I missed a class and lost my morale at the same time. However, sometimes, the risks we take lead to great rewards. I was there, to witness the mauling of a lamb that was ever so naive to think a lion could not recover from its wounds.

On this great morning, Wednesday, 11th of April 2007, Manchester United thrashed AS Roma by SEVEN GOALS to one. Two outstanding, out of the penalty box goals by Michael Carrick, and another brace by Cristiano Ronaldo, added in with Wayne Rooney's first Champions League goal of the season, another by a DEFENDER, Patrice Evra and another from comeback wonderkid, Alan Smith. By far, by very far, this was the best game of football I've watched in the many years of my lifetime.

As of now, my utility is at it's maximum point on the graph and the opportunity cost is just TOO FAR outweighed to have any value.

Monday, April 09, 2007

Can I just snap out of it? Friggin annoying to be this way.

But anyway, I wanted to post something to honour someone I believe to be very special.

Just during my English drama practice last week before good Friday, I got a message at about 12 something. It was from a dear friend of mine, Ooi Khye Shin. Before I go on, let me explain why I bother to mention Khye Shin's name here.

Just two years ago, Khye Shin and I were performing as well as Cristiano Ronaldo is now at failing my Chemistry and Biology tests. The year is 2005, the year I took SPM. Almost half a year is over and I'm facing absolute failure. My mum had a contact in the church for this 'excellent' Chemistry tutor who could change any idiot into a Chemistry genius, trust me, it is true. Now this tutor works in a family run business, used to be in ashop lot in Subang, but now it's in a house near the same area.

Now, this centre had a 'principle', a slightly older lady who was basically in charge of the place. She was doing most of the admin stuff. She's a very nice lady, very cheerful.Khye Shin and I enjoyed some small talk with her every now and then when not being in the process of being transformed from being Chemistrydumbasses into more decent learners of the subject. She's someone that I'm comfortable with and have no trouble talking to, yet you give her the respect she deserves because you can sense that strong figure within her.

Just the year after, this lady was diagnosed with cancer. If it was me, I think I'd have broken down and just give up on life. After all, there's not much I'd feel worth living for when deep in your heart you know you'll be gone between now and five years later maximum. This lady really has a strong heart, and really faced her adversity straight on. Somehow, she's not a depressed woman and she keeps on doing what she does on a daily basis in the exact same fashion before she was diagnosed with cancer.

You know, I see her in the church bringing her young nieces along and sometimes I don't even realise that she's got cancer. The joy in her life is ever so evident and she's not lost the purpose of her life. She was so good about it until I basically forgot that she ever had cancer even before I came toUTP . Even when I went back to KL and I'd see her every now and then but it wouldn't pop into my mind that she was actually unwell because she seemed very very well just like the rest of us. I truly believe that it's the tremendous Spirit that she's had that has kept her for this long. Going on two years with the knowledge that you can be off in the next second is extremely difficult but she took it to a whole different look with joy in her life and her wonderful expression of it on her face.

Just about two or slightly few more months ago, she was declared terminally ill and was warded in hospital. She and everyone else knew there wasn't much time left. I went in once to pass her food within these last few months and I STILL SEE the exact same positive attitude, and she's still joyful even as her body is weak. I didn't see her after that. It was on that night thatKhye Shin messaged me that she passed away.

Deep down, I'll honestly say that I wasn't really sad. Sure I do feel sad that she had to go but somehow I felt happy for her. That's because I just think she went off real peacefully with the perfect confidence that she would be with her Father in heaven. Her awesome faith in God to pull her through was just amazing. She looked death in the eye and smiled at it, LITERALLY. How many of you can in perfect confidence do that? I personally believe that only people who know their life is fulfilled can possibly be that way. I just have to thank God for the life of an awesome woman, who has truly been a great example and an inspiration to me and many others in her family.


I thank God for you. I thank God that you get to be right next to Him. Enjoy your stay in heaven. =)

Where do I go from here

Been wanting to post for quite a while but I don't usually blog for the sake of it. Life's been quite a blur as of late. Everything doesn't seem to be a routine, yet I feel like I'm going through every day just to pass the time. Once again, I have to look at myself and figure out why I do what I do and what I hope to get out of everything in the end.

No question, uni's all about doing well in academics and perhaps the long process of it is just boring me, perhaps. It's not exactly very exciting but it can get panicky at times. Then there's friends, or a few of them at least. Hang out with them every now and then, yet it seems I'm still bored and I don't find any fulfillment in it, not that it's their fault. Just as I said, everything just seems very bleh..... Then there are computer games which just occupy my 'lazy time', not free time mind you. As my friend said, we don't have any free time, just lazy times where we don't want to do anything. The addiction glues me to the computer, not the satisfaction of winning anything.

Then, there's church which practically eats away at my weekends, which I thought would be much more free when I moved here from KL. Apparently, not much has changed for me in that aspect, as much as I want it to. It just seems that my life right now has just a lot to do with doing. I'm just fed up with doing for doing's sake. Once again, the question of purpose comes into play. What on earth am I doing all this for. Is there a tangible value to the things I do?

The reason is lost, the goal is unseen, the target seems vague and just too far away. It feels as if life is just there for the sake of living and doing whatever you choose when you're alive. Obviously and predictably, everyone says there's much more to it than that. I'm not oblivious to the fact, it's just that I can't really see it right now.

The heart feels heavy because it can't find that piece of joy that's supposed to be embedded in it somewhere. It can't find the meaning of the purpose because it's perceived by the mind to be cliche. Where do I go from here?

Monday, April 02, 2007

What is right? What is wrong?

With just a slight reference to my previous post, in Christianity itself, there are so many new Christians or maybe non-believers who ask is doing this ok? Is it all right if I do this? What happens if I don't do this? What happens if I do this? Is is still acceptable if I do this in another way? It all adds up to a simple question, if I do this, am I wrong?

There is a concern here as to doing what pleases God. It's a healthy problem as I believe somewhere in the heart of new believers, there is a desire to obey Him and of course is a step of obedience in part of developing a wonderful relationship with their Father. Nonetheless, when you ask those questions above, it makes Christianity a set of rules, and no longer a faith that is a about a relationship between you and God.

Here's what apostle Paul has to say about it:

I say to you, live by the Spirit and you will not succumb to desires of sinful nature because the sinful nature is just the opposite of the Spirit. One thing I tell you, if you are led by the Spirit, you are NOT under law. Acts of sinful nature are obvious, sexual immorality, impurity, debauchery, idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, envy, drunkenness, orgies and the like. I warn you, thos living like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.

However, the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is NO LAW. Those who belong to Jesus Christ have crucified their sinful nature, along with its passions and desires. Since we live by the Spirit, keep in step with the Spirit. Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other.

So if you're a Christian, and you have those kind of questions, here's your answer. Just ask yourself, the thing I'm doing, what's the outcome? You know, God only wants the best for you, nothing less. He's never been about taking away your happiness and having super rigid rules as your ticket to heaven. You got your ticket, when you accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Saviour, that he died on the cross, his life as a ransom of your sin, that you may have eternal life. Life after that is basically, just developing a relationship with Him, and he just lets you know a number of things that'll help you do that.

Radical or Not, I think not.

The following post, is not aimed at criticising any party for any reason whatsoever. It does not criticise any religion and this post is only aimed at truthfully stating my thoughts respectfully with regard to all parties involved on the matter. Whether you like it or not is NOT my concern.

Lately, read a couple of my fellow uni mates blogs, and they've shared a little about a blogger, who wrote something to her fellow friends in Islam. She blogged about her religious point of view regarding Euphonious. (if you haven't already read a lot of my recent previous posts, Euphonious is a battle of the bands competition, which I've been knocked out off by very very good competition, Felix you should see them dude)

If you'd like to read it, and have the patience to go through something a little long, here're the links

http:danielle.blogspot.com/2007/05/euphonious-2007.html
http://danialle.blogspot.com/2007/03/euphonious-2007-reloaded.html

There are a lot of people who of course are quite unhappy about the follwing posts. It basically just totally discourages anyone from attending the event without feeling condemned by their creator, to know that its a sin to attend such an event, because there's nothing about the event that promotes the culture of the faith, potentially cuts into prayer times, causes you to think in a sinful manner and a lot of other things. At the same time, there are a number of supporters.

One thing that caught my attention a little was that she talked about this all-girl band which happen to be Malay Muslims and, knowing the culture of very open minded Malays, they didn't wear head scarfs (tudung) from wn a manner unacceptable to the faith. There's also mention about how uncontrollable behaviour by spectatorhat I know is in opposition to one of the fundamental beliefs of the Muslim faith. She went on to mention how the lead singer's stage etiquette was unacceptable, apparently the way she moves on stage is is are also illegal. She also mentioned about inappropriate spectator behaviour by which I believe she means, screaming and shouting support which I believe to be a norm at any concert-like event.

Having read that, a lot of people started commenting on her blog and I started to think what I thought about what she said. To be very honest with you, I don't have a comprehensive understanding of the Islamic faith, from what I believe I know, there are a lot of rules to follow, wearing head-scarves is just part of that. Some people have very differing intepretations of what Islam has to say regarding things like this.

From my rough understanding, not very good understanding but a rough one; Islam is very firm in its stands on many areas. The faith has many guidelines for the believers of this faith, and many are the consequences as well for not obeying them. The fact that many guidelines exist have evolved into what I guess are now perceived as rules simply because of the consequences or repercussions. In Malaysia, where more modernised states are undoubtedly influenced more by western media than those that are not, people are generally more open, receptive, and hence tend to compromise.

But about this I am very sure, Islam is very adamant on snuffing out at absolutely any situation for sin to come around the corner. Following that, there are alot of rules, some may call it rigid and has no room for compromise. This is actually the blogger's main point, that there are compromises in the prevention of sin that make this event not halal. She was concerned about Muslims putting themselves intentionally or unintentionally in situations that might cause them to sin.

You see, Islam, in it's pure form does not allow many things or events that are habitually held in our country. The blogger herself mentioned events such as One in a Million and Sure Heboh I think that include performances by Malay female artists that don't 'cover up enough' and so forth. If some guy asks me, "So do you think Euphonious is halal? Bear in mind, I'm not a Muslim, but I would most probably answer, "I'd say... it definitely is not."

Why? Simply because there definitely are these compromises that I believe a pure Muslim would have to make, if he or she wanted to attend. Some don't realise them, some do but close one eye on it. It basically speaks of ignorance.

Even so, I can tell you, that conscientic feeling is not going to stop a lot of people from going. This is what I believe, everything is permissable, not everything is beneficial. Euphonious is simply an event where people get the chance to perform, have fun, listen to music that contains no explicit lyrics which has been specified by the committee. There is nothing wrong with having fun, even the blogger said it herself.

Of course, for me, there's nothing wrong with Euphonious. This is my point of view as a Christian. As for putting yourself in situations that cause you to sin, let me ask you something, have you not been made in the image of God Himself that you should be able to know what is right and what is wrong? Euphonious puts you in a simple situation where you may sit in an auditorium with dimmed lights and perhaps next to a girl or maybe not. Do you not have any self control of your body as not to start getting stupid and thinking dirty stuff about a hot girl sitting next to you? If you do not have this control, I will tell you, you definitely should not go to Euphonious, I can tell you that it's in the bible, but if you do have control, which I truly believe most people have, it's definitely permissable and beneficial to go for Euphonious? Why beneficial? God likes to see His people happy, and I know for sure, music definitely makes people happy.